Funny Cat Quotes

These are some Funny Quotes About Cats

Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will urinate on your computer.
~ Unknown

If animals could speak the dog would be a a blundering outspoken fellow, but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.
~ Mark Twain

I can't use Windows. My cat ate my mouse.
~Unknown

God made the cat in order that humankind might have the pleasure of caressing the tiger.
~ Fernand Mery

People who take cat naps don't usually sleep in a cat's cradle.
~Unknown

In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats.
~ English Proverb

When I played in the sandbox the cat kept covering me up.
~ Rodney Dangerfield

Dogs have owners, cats have staff.
~ Unknown

Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.
~ Anonymous

No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat, and no amount of masking tape can ever totally remove his fur from your couch.
~ Leo Dworken

Every dog has his day - but the nights are reserved for the cats
~ Unknown

Cats know how to obtain food without labor, shelter without confinement, and love without penalties.
~ W. L. George

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way.
~Mark Twain

Cats are kindly masters, just so long as you remember your place.
~ Paul Gray

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose.
~ Garrison Keillor

If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve man, but it would deteriorate the cat.
~ Mark Twain

The cat, having sat upon a hot stove lid, will not sit upon a hot stove lid again. But he won't sit upon a cold stove lid, either.
~Mark Twain


A cat is there when you call her - if she doesn't have anything better to do
~Bill Adler

The trouble with cats is that they've got no tact.
~ P. G. Wodehouse

The cat has too much spirit to have no heart
~Ernest Menaul


The little furry buggers are just deep, deep wells you throw all your emotions into.
~Bruce Schimmel

Most beds sleep up to six cats. Ten cats without the owner.
~Anonymice

You can't own a cat. The best you can do is be partners.
~ Sir Harry Swanson

As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat.
~ Ellen Perry Berkeley

In the middle of a world that has always been a bit mad, the cat walks with confidence.
~Roseanne Anderson


If a cat does something, we call it instinct; if we do the same thing, for the same reason, we call it intelligence. ~Will Cuppy


A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution.
~ Hazel Nicholson

Cats were put into the world to disprove the dogma that all things were created to serve man.
~Paul Gray

If you are worthy of its affection, a cat will be your friend but never your slave.
~Theophile Gautier

By associating with the cat one only risks becoming richer.
~ Colette

When you are looking, a cat acts like a princess, but the minute they think you are not looking, a cat acts like a fool.
~ KC Buffington